Sunday, April 19, 2015

an... update?

I've written two extremely long blogs today that I can't post.  I can't finish my thoughts.

I'm bouncing from subject to subject...

This has been my problem and my reason for not blogging.

I can't say how I really feel because people get hurt.

People can't let me voice my feelings without getting upset at something I say.

So therefore I stopped writing these things down.

I stopped blogging although I have a shit ton to say.

I have to try to rewrite things to make them politically correct or make sure I'm not going to hurt anyone's feelings... therefore when I try to write I can't handle it.  I can't handle editing myself.

That's just ridiculous.

My blog was my outlet... now I don't have it.

Here's the gist:
I'm celebrating my 3 year wedding anniversary with my husband.

I'm still bipolar.

I harbor a lot of anger toward about 95% of my family on my dad's side (I'm not sure of the math, I just know that it's more people than not)

I'm still anxious.

I still have flashbacks.

My body still hurts.

I can't expand on any of these things because I can't focus.  Hurrah mania!

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